How I treated my Panic Attacks, by April McClelland.

My story started about 15 years ago after an unpleasant go round with a buyer of one of my thoroughbred horses. I raise and train horses and this woman wanted to purchase a mare that I had put a fair amount of training into. My wife loved the horse and thought I should keep her, but I thought I needed the money worse than the horse.

Anyway, the woman who bought her was very critical about the horse, probably just to get the price down, but I took it personally. I wanted to just leave with the horse, but the deal had already been struck and against my better judgment I let it go through. That night I woke suddenly in my motel room. My heart was racing, my mouth was dry; a cold sweat broke out as I opened my eyes. It was pitch dark in the room; I could see nothing and I honestly thought either I was dead or dying.

In misery, I lay in the bed clutching the pillow as absolute waves of terror rolled over me. I was unable to even reach over and turn on the bedside light. Finally daylight came and some sounds from outside seemed to take the ice out of my veins. I was able to get up and function somewhat normally through the day, but became more and more nervous about spending another night in a strange motel room before returning home.

…I prayed to God to show me what to do
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I drove from Idaho all the way to Missouri without stopping except for a quick nap by the side of the road. I was honestly afraid to close my eyes at night for fear of a return of the mind numbing terror. From that time on, I was afraid to sleep, I napped only during the day when someone was around, yet if they made any noise I was instantly awake with my heart in my throat. My wife learned not to touch me while I was napping or sleeping; more than once I’d start awake wild-eyed, only to realize she had spoken to me. The last straw for her was when I hit her, in one of my night attacks.

She told me I had to get help or she’d not stick around, and I tried. I did the whole medical and drug thing until I felt like a zombie all the time. And I was still having occasional attacks. I’d try to hide them from her, but I’d still see how worried she looked at night sometimes. Finally she started sleeping in another bedroom. I know it was because she was afraid of what I might do. I didn’t blame her, believe me. I know she was pretty stressed about the whole situation.

I’d feel a little better for a while, and then cut back on my medications and within a week, I was in terror two or three times a week. After one particularly bad episode, I thought I must be losing my mind. In desperation, she called for the men in the white coats and I spent about two weeks being evaluated for psychiatric treatment.

On one of her visits, my wife brought a print-out of a little one hundred page book called “Panic Away” and I have to tell you, it turned my life around. I immediately started putting the principles and information into practice. Since I didn’t have much else to do in the hospital, I read the book, and then reread it. The very next time I felt an attack coming, I did the One Move maneuver and the other things I read about in the book and they worked.

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It hasn’t been all roses and candlelight, but it’s been over 18 months now without an attack. I don’t even worry about having them any more. Neither does my wife.
It took a few months, but we’re back together and I sure am glad she decided to purchase that book and give it to me.

Maybe you haven’t had the experience of waking up and thinking you must have died or of hitting out at someone you love because you were terrified, or of going for days and months with not enough sleep, and I hope you never do. But for those who suffer any of the panic attack symptoms, I’d sure recommend getting a copy of the book and putting it into practice.

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